After telling Carl about his special time of eating ice cream and playing the count-the-car-game with his dad, Russell said, "It may sound boring but...it's the boring stuff that I remember the most." Something like that. I guess I really don't have much to say. That, to me, is a wonderful truth. It was the "small, boring stuff" that filled Ellie's and Carl's life together. Sorry; I don't mean to take it so seriously, I mean I know it's just a cartoon...but at the same time, I felt tonight that what it was actually showing was the meaning of life. Ellie was happy with her life, satisfied, not regretful or sad or upset- she didn't get to go on any big adventures...but the real adventure was living their "normal" lives day after day. They did it together. Their lives were filled with love, and that was enough; they were happy.
Not only is it a love story, but it's a life story. At one of the lowest points in the movie, when Carl has to throw everything out of his house so it will float again, Mel and I both appreciated the symbolism of having to let go in order to move on. He hadn't really said goodbye to Ellie, yet; he was filled with nastalgia and fear; he surrounded himself with memmories, but he stopped living his own life.
I know I do that: surround myself with nostalgic memmories of times when everything felt okay. Or feel completely lost without my "things," my "house," the symbols of my security, that the thought of facing the future without them makes me feel hopeless and lost.
I do feel a bit lost right now, on the whole. It's easy to feel lost when you think about the future too much. A day is going "badly," and I feel overwhelmed with all that I have to do, and I feel like I'm losing all my securities, and the storm is popping all my baloons and nothing is going according to my plan- then to think of days ahead, 1 day, 5 days, 2 weeks, a few months, a year, 10 years... it's a bad idea; it can seem a bit hopless and terribly heartbreaking if you happen to feel alone when you "project" into how your life may end up. What a foolish thing to do.
(This picture doesn't have to do with any idea in particular- I just think it's really cool/cute- and I want to see them and take a picture with them! With Andrew, Brian, Areli, Jessica, Rachel, and Anthony! :') )
You are a very good writer. I love listening to the ordinary things in your life. They make me feel closer to you. I thrill at the exciting things that are happening also. I get so excited to see what God is doing in your life. You are a deep thinker. A thoughtful heart. There are no worries about the future. See Carl's life didn't end up the way he wanted it to. The trip didn't even turn out the way he planned.
ReplyDeleteAnd when he finally reached his goal. God had much better things planned for his life. The same is true for all of us. I never in a million years thought my life would end up where it has. At some point I just let go. I had to, The more I tried to get control, and plan the more depressed and out of control it became. God had much much better things planned for my life. I am glad I gave up. I would have been a fighter pilot, or Anthropologist. So I could travel the world. I am so much happier and fulfilled in the life He has given me. Never fret about your future. It is going to be Great. Let go and Hold on for the ride of your life. I love you
Thank you so much. This meant to much to me- that you read and especially your encouraging words of wisdom; i deeply appreciate it and soak it in :)
ReplyDeleteBeing a senior in HS has been so wierd for me because it's a time when I'm supposed to be responsible- by PLANNING for my future, and I would love to be able to make decisions now that would make things easier for myself later on. But on the opposite side of things, I can't REALLY plan ANYTHING- kind of like you said. I am having such a difficult time finding the balance, and it's causing me a great deal of unrest.
Knowing you and getting to read a little bit abou your life, though, is really great and gives me hope :)
thanks, I love you too